Good Deed #29: Helping the Real Heroes

Yesterday I came home after a long day of work and couldn't believe how many chores I had to do around the house. For one of the first times it gave me a real appreciation for the homemakers of the world who take care of the household while their loved ones are away. I've been in the AF long enough to know that the people who do the real work are those behind the scenes. Today I donated money to the Air Force Assistance Fund and specifically the Air Force Village Foundation which helps takes care of retired officers' widows. After years of supporting their spouse so that they may help defend this country, it's only right that we take care of them back.

Good Deed #28: Whatever It Takes

This basketball season I probably could have counted a lot of events as "good deeds," in my personal tracker. But to me, coaching brings me back to why I set out on this endeavor to begin with. Sure I would have liked to have completed all of these deeds in one year, but sometimes things don't always go our way. Take my season for instance, my players did everything that was asked for them and in the end we had a blast despite losing in the championship game to a team whose coach did not play by the rules. The league rules state that everyone must play a minimum of 5 minutes per game. In the championship game he had three players who played 2:05. Instead of complaining, I went with it and realized that not all adults think that the rules apply to them, nor do they have the same level of integrity. To my own personal satisfaction I felt good about how I approached that game knowing that the opposing coach was going to cheat by playing his starting five for the entire game. I knew I could sleep well at night because I did right by my team. They had gone to all of the practices all season long and deserved to play. I also knew that despite his best efforts, I without a doubt "out-coached him" anyways...yup that felt good.

After the game was over I expected that our team would have received a runner-up trophy for having come in 2nd place during the playoffs. I was wrong. Instead, the league director handed out a regular season 1st place trophy to the same team who won the championship. That's right, two trophies were awarded to the winning team that day while my players walked off the court with a handshake. Awards mean nothing to me but I know they mean something to young men. What does matter to me is recognition, not in a celebratory way but just as a way of saying "thanks." At the end of my season I had several players come up to me to say that very thing "thanks." To me, it meant more than any trophy that I could hold or any award that could have been given to me.

Youth basketball coaches often do a lot more than what parents may see during the hour long games on friday night or saturday morning. We make phone calls to remind players of practices and rescheduled games, we wait at the end of our practices for our players parents to arrive and pick them up. We even show up early so that there is a chaperone in the gym for those who arrive early. Often we even go beyond that. This year I had to pick up one of my players for every Tuesday practice (we practiced twice a week, games twice a week) I would have to get out of work early, drive 30 minutes out of my way, only to rush to the gym so that we could make practice. In addition, I routinely drove two other players after practices so that they could catch the tail end of their siblings basketball games. This year I also held a pizza party at Chuck-E-Cheese for the players and families with tokens for games included, none of this was required by the league.

Per the usual, I spent hours drafting playbooks of the ever-changing (never perfect) offensive and defensive schemes and printed them off to hand out with each revision. I made a game plan for every practice the night prior and took pride in being the most organized and best coached team in the league. I suppose I have my High School basketball Coach to thank for that. Like the previous year, I also sent the players a personal note and thanked them for the season as well as an 8x10 photo which I had printed up since the team photographs that the private company they use are usually too expensive for most families.

At the end of the year the league had an all-star game and BBQ. I agreed to volunteer to set up and upon arriving I noticed that there wasn't enough soft drinks to support all of the people. I quickly made a run to the store to purchase more soda with my own money. To me it didn't matter that I had to pay for it, all I cared about was that people could enjoy themselves. In circumstances like that, however small and insignificant as it may have seemed, I was willing to do what it took to get the job done right.

Coaching youth basketball (when done right) is hard work. I may even argue that it's tougher then what some of these paid coaches on TV have to deal with. Even so, I enjoyed every minute of it. It's too bad that I will be in Afghanistan next year and will not have the opportunity to coach again. With all that society has said about our younger generations and how ill-equipped they are to handle the "real world" with their lack of skills, I for one can point to 11 youth basketball players and know that in them, I tried to make a difference. Like the old adage, "It's incredible how much good can be accomplished when nobody cares who gets the credit." For me, all of the credit goes to them. I'm just sure glad I was a part of it.

Good Deed #27: Home Base

I try to never miss an opportunity to honor our country and those who have fought to defend it. Call me old school, but there are just certain things that I do not compromise over. Tonight I read a post about some servicemembers that were on base to watch the Super Bowl and did not stand during the playing of the National Anthem. While they have served their country, they have also neglected to adhere to a very proud tradition. Just as I read this post, a few minutes later I got an email to donate money towards servicemembers who have suffered from traumatic brain injuries. I couldn't pass it up. This is an injury that is often overlooked, I'm glad Fenway has decided to team up with New Balance to bring awareness and raise money for these brave Patriots. If you'd like to donate please visit Run to Home Base.

Good Deed #26: Teaching

This year I am coaching youth basketball again. Like 99% of coaches around the world I don't do it for the money, the publicity or in most instances, the "love of the game." Rather, I coach because I know in a small way I am able to have a big impact and make a difference. Whether it is on the basketball court, baseball diamond or football field, millions of youths are out there giving an effort to become not just better athletes but better citizens. Cooperation and teamwork, hardwork and dediction, integrity and character, honor and pride are a few of the attributes that are bestowed on athletes when they learn that these "finer points" of the game have very little to do with dribbling a basketball or making a jump shot. It's amazing how I can look back at my childhood and remember almost every coach I ever had and even the lessons that they taught me, which I learned and applied later in life.

Coach Levesque (HS Basketball) "It's not the will to win, it's the will to prepare to win."

Coach Fitzgerald (HS Football) "It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."

Coach Sullivan (College football) "Do you believe?"

Coach Murphy (College football) "Why not us?"

Coach Carroll (My Dad) "It's a game of passing"


Since joining the military I have been thanked countless times by friends and strangers for my service. And while I appreciate the recognition, I can honestly say that I believe I have a greater degree of impact on my 4th graders than I do on my Nation at large. I encourage others to take time out of their day and find a way to impact their local communities. I challenge those who have followed my "deeds" thus far to use their own talents, perhaps resources and do something good for a stranger. I can guarantee that you will walk away satisfied knowing that you are contributing to the success of our world's future.

Good Deed #25: Going the Distance

The theme of a lot of my good deeds throughout this experiment have involved a combination of fundraising and running. This one is no exception. As I donated to my former basketball coach, mentor and friend's campaign to raise money for his 1/2 marathon endeavor, I began to think about the cause that he was running for. See, for each runner there is often a higher purpose than just the activity and pushing the physical boundaries. Often, it is about a higher purpose, whether that is setting a goal for oneself, becoming a better athlete, the drive of competition or giving to a charity. Philanthropy in endurance athletes often go hand in hand. Rarely do I do an event that doesn't contribute to some higher mission somehow. There is just something so pure and so inspiring in athletes who prepare and put themselves through agony (or what Coach considers "suffering") for someone else's cause. That's real sacrifice in action.

This race in particular is going towards Child and Family Services. The aim of this organization is to provide social services in order to strengthen families. It's a tremendous organization and one I hope you would consider donating too as well. You can donate to: http://www.active.com/donate/CFS2010/gstriclub

Good Deed #24: Voting

Recently I've been procrastinating. Let's face it, this blog is a great example. And while I'm trying to play catch up, I've allowed my procrastination to spill into other areas of my life. Next Tuesday is the general elections, 6 emails, 3 fax machine attempts and $18 later, I have cast my absentee ballot. I don't know if my vote is worth $18 but I know my freedom to vote is priceless. It was surprising to walk around work today asking my colleagues if they had voted and to receive negative responses. It is because voting (especially in mid-term elections) is so rare that I consider it not only a good deed but my patriotic duty. Apathy has taken hold in our country. We are becoming more reliant on others to do things for us. We feel that we have less influence and control over our own destinies. We are fast moving towards a country of whiners and complainers instead of a Nation of problem solvers, doers and believers. Hope may have died on that historic day two years ago when we saw our President elected. In return, we've been cursed by a disease of resentment, finger pointing and pessimism. Those same people who see the country's glass as being half empty, I'm willing to bet are the same ones who wouldn't bother trying to vote.

Absentee voting in the military is not too difficult. I've been doing it for years. But when the clerk at the post office tells you that in order to guarantee delivery for Monday morning the cost will be $18...well then you start to get a "values" gut check at the door. I can't put a price on what that ballot means for me. Go ahead and ask Afghanis who risk being shot or blown up on their way to the polling station what the "freedom to vote means." It's your civil right to vote. And if you're worried about the future of the country and want to effect change, it's your obligation!

Good Deed #23: Combined Federal Campaign

Each year government employees have the opportunity to donate to thousands of charities via the "Combined Federal Campaign" fund. Since non-profit organizations are not allowed to solicit from government employees throughout the year, annually they are given the opportunity to donate to a charity of their choosing. This year I decided to give a portion of my salary each month to the Wounded Warriors Fund and two charities that fight hunger. I am so thankful for those warriors who have put themselves in harms way so that I can maintain my way of life. I am also appalled that with all that we have as Americans that we can still allow people to go hungry each day. It doesn't add up and it doesn't make sense. I wish I could do more and I know that I'll have to start donating my time at a soup kitchen eventually. But for now, I hope I have reached some of you and perhaps even compelled a few of you to think about what you ate for dinner (or what you didn't eat) and ask yourself if people in this country should go to bed hungry?